the art of starting over

one hundred and forty three

2011-10-16T19:02:00.000-07:00

savoring
each

sweet and crisp

golden

autumn

moment

one hundred and forty two

2011-10-12T06:31:00.000-07:00

i turned a little white board

that used to be completely covered in

an endless to-do list

into a sweet, ever-changing

daily message board.

makes me a lot happier now.

things will still get done,
i am quite certain.

but perhaps

with a brighter smile,

a softer heart.

one hundred and forty one

2011-08-14T17:42:00.000-07:00

eastern skies

the sultry sounds of sunni

lunchtime view

train station reflections

in the passenger seat

hopeful blossom

yes

rest in peace, sweet bailey

one hundred and forty

2011-08-09T15:35:00.000-07:00

down by the seaside

***

one hundred and thirty nine

2011-06-13T13:46:00.000-07:00

summer daydreams

finding her heart

full moon magic

favorite game

seaside moments

blooming life

one hundred and thirty eight

2011-06-11T08:04:00.000-07:00

i am back!

been busy with the sweet, sweet business of

falling in love.

swimming and dancing

through

beautiful newness.

everything has changed.

completely.

and it is all simply amazing.

every moment.

learning and softening

and opening and dreaming.

and i never

ever

dreamed

i could feel

this kind of

true

happiness.

so much love.

so much gratitude.

one hundred and thirty seven

2011-03-27T06:19:00.000-07:00

*Salem Sunday*

maybe this picture was actually taken in Brooklyn

but that's okay

Love Lane

seems like a really nice place to be today

one hundred and thirty six

2011-03-25T18:21:00.000-07:00

dreamy march skies

springtime slowly unraveling

and i marvel

at each

and every

moment

one hundred and thirty five

2011-03-24T05:44:00.000-07:00

a cup of tea
and
some sweet words of
wisdom

one hundred and thirty four

2011-03-21T14:28:00.000-07:00

thinking of

wholeness

and slowness

and stillness

and love.

one hundred and thirty three

2011-03-07T07:15:00.000-08:00

Three sweet days in Florida

with my mom & godmother....amazing!

The perfect winter elixir.

Sunshine

and

rest

and

laughter

and

love love love.

one hundred and thirty two

2011-02-26T06:20:00.000-08:00

Just a quick note

this morning

Light heart

quiet mind

simple contentment

May everyone

everywhere

be well

be happy

be free

one hundred and thirty one

2011-02-21T12:24:00.000-08:00

*Salem Monday*

a day late for my little weekly photo project

so three pictures today

it's been a week of ups and downs

a lot of learning
and doing my very best

to stay on my path

to stay connected
...not easy...
but absolutely worth it

i am becoming newly curious

and inspired

by my craft
(dance is so amazing!)
inspired by all the incredible people
i am lucky to call friends
and
inspired again and again
by another day
another breath

in this beautiful
life

so much gratitude

one hundred and thirty

2011-02-13T13:23:00.000-08:00

*Salem Sunday*

(been down with the flu all week...more posting very soon!)

one hundred and twenty nine

2011-02-06T15:57:00.000-08:00

*Salem Sunday*

one hundred and twenty eight

2011-01-31T13:04:00.000-08:00

january has been a long, long, challenging month

i am so happy to say hello to february

ready for newness

ready to burn brighter

shine brighter

love more

watching the changes in this sweet little plant,

a gift from a sweet little dancer,

has been

a daily reminder

that growth and beauty

and delicate loveliness

can still be found

in the endless winter

gives me hope.

one hundred and twenty seven

2011-01-30T20:31:00.000-08:00

*Salem Sunday*

one hundred and twenty six

2011-01-24T08:28:00.000-08:00

yesterday

as i was waiting for the train

instead of just standing there

and staring down the tracks

as most people do

i decided to really open my eyes

searching for the tiny details

in the sheltering walls

that i usually never notice at all

it's funny...when life feels especially challenging

and i am getting that feeling of being isolated, being stuck

i find it incredibly inspiring and comforting

to not take a step back

but take a step in

to see ordinary things as if for the first time

newness on daily paths

sweetness in the simple

brightness in the cold

magic in the mundane

heart

multiplication

soul sticker

for susan

message to someone

perfect circle

one hundred and twenty five

2011-01-23T16:01:00.001-08:00

*Salem Sunday*

one hundred and twenty four

2011-01-21T12:50:00.000-08:00

juxtaposition

one hundred and twenty three

2011-01-19T07:49:00.000-08:00

icy branches

sunrise on the train

one hundred and twenty two

2011-01-17T11:58:00.000-08:00

*Salem Sunday*

one hundred and twenty one

2011-01-14T18:54:00.000-08:00

two new collages

crafted during the snowstorm

(detail)

one hundred and twenty

2011-01-12T08:17:00.000-08:00

snow day!

a blizzard is happening right now and i couldn't be happier.

twinkle lights are lit up, coffee & green smoothie in my belly,

wonderful music from my favorite morning dj.

i made a little list of things i want to do today.

it's quite an awesome list.

includes things like:

meditate, make a collage, upload new photos, practice yoga,

and watch movies in bed.

even though my heart is on another coast,

and i really wish i could share part of this fun day with

one of my faraway kindred spirits,

i am content.

i am grateful.

a few more images from holiday time....

one hundred and nineteen

2011-01-10T18:15:00.000-08:00

this is what home looks like...

one hundred and eighteen

2011-01-09T13:22:00.000-08:00

*Salem Sunday*

in honor of the new year and magic and beauty and everyday magnificence

i'll be doing something every sunday from here on out

i'll be walking about my sweet town

and

opening my eyes

seeking out one small slice of

something unique

and beautiful

a little glimpse of an untold story

here is the first:

one hundred and seventeen

2011-01-04T19:37:00.000-08:00

happy new year

i am so smitten with these days

the sun setting on one year

and shining on another

i am hopeful

i am thinking

and

i am dreaming

of
heart-opening

truth
breath
healing
joy
home

and

(of course)

LOVE

one hundred and sixteen

2010-12-28T10:36:00.000-08:00

diving into

and through

memories

and

dreams

days and years

that have passed and gone

and

this very moment

deep waters

and

dark paths

and

a million

bright lights

that remind me

it is never too late

to forgive

to love

to begin again.

one hundred and fifteen

2010-12-23T06:50:00.000-08:00

...on the threshold...

one hundred and fourteen

2010-12-23T06:46:00.000-08:00

this lonely winter gull

flies in the sky outside my top-floor window

and tugs my heart

home

california seaside tomorrow

family and friends and little ones growing up

laughter and rest and magic

and time passing so sweet and so slow

merry christmas

may your world be filled with love

one hundred and thirteen

2010-12-19T13:50:00.000-08:00

the path is turning again

unknown things

and

as always

as ever

sadness and joy

intertwine

and i must

let it all be

and remember that everything

works so much better

when i breathe

and love

and

put all of my trust into

this big

wild heart

one hundred and twelve

2010-12-17T07:58:00.000-08:00

perhaps the sweetest

holiday message ever

from one of my young students

so much love

one hundred and eleven

2010-12-17T07:11:00.000-08:00

december goes so fast

and sunshine is like medicine

when the air bites with cold

and i take things quietly, easily, softly

i let go

and i let go again

i am learning to be as thankful for the challenges

as i am for the joys

i am learning to love

what is right here

inside

immediate

true

one hundred and ten

2010-12-13T08:01:00.000-08:00

one hundred and nine

2010-11-26T08:43:00.000-08:00

one hundred and eight

2010-11-22T12:11:00.000-08:00

dear san francisco,

i miss you.

love,

one hundred and seven

2010-11-22T12:07:00.000-08:00

the beautiful world

(as seen on my walk from the bus stop to work each day)

one hundred and six

2010-11-15T12:04:00.000-08:00

it's been far, far too long since i've posted here.

life has been happening.

quiet and full and rich and sad and sweet.

and it goes on and on...

some random images for today:

kiss in the morning light

note to self

collage-making on a gray monday

the magic salem seaside

one hundred and five

2010-10-07T10:16:00.000-07:00

themes of this season

(and perhaps this life)

---

loving

and

letting go

one hundred and four

2010-09-22T18:57:00.000-07:00

some more little joys...

taking my breakfast up the loft ladder and back to bed!

the public library...one of my very favorite places to be.

inspiring neighborhood signs.

and...

and finally...tonight's breathtaking autumn moon.

one hundred and three

2010-09-21T09:18:00.000-07:00

memories...

...so strange how they choose to surface.

how certain funny, tiny details stay with us.

and other, perhaps bigger, things seem to slip away.

this morning in yoga class, a place where many thoughts

and memories and dreams emerge, we were backbending and

all of a sudden i had a crystalline memory

of these delicious chocolate banana malted milkshakes.

they were from the old-fashioned burger place

right next door to that one apartment he rented in the mission district.

he would meet me there sometimes

or i'd surprise him with a stop there on my way over.

and we'd sit on his bed and delight in the yumminess of the shakes.

and we'd laugh and love the night away.

though bittersweet, i am thankful for this little memory.

it makes me smile.

and linger, for a moment,

in that space that is long gone.

sweet and fleeting and true.

one hundred and two

2010-09-20T08:18:00.000-07:00

a few things

that have made me happy lately...

my sweet view as i wait for the morning train:

salad with flowers:

silly subway ads:

new york city:

walking everywhere:

gift of jewels! (thank you Se'lah and Cinner):

one hundred and one

2010-09-12T16:14:00.000-07:00

low tide...

one hundred

2010-08-27T12:23:00.000-07:00

six days on a solo vacation

to visit beautiful Montreal

for the very first time

an absolutely incredible and inspiring city

i think it might be

one of my most favorite places

in the world

ninety-nine

2010-08-19T02:18:00.001-07:00

for now...

late summer

balmy nights

and

lonely

lovely

afternoons

walking over

cobblestones

over bridges

through towns

we lived in

once

and

the seaside

weeping willow

trees

and breezes

and boats

and daydream

memories

i wake up to the sky

shining down

and

sometimes

i think

i might
be home

ninety-eight

2010-08-02T06:06:00.000-07:00

the quiet rainbow

ninety-seven

2010-07-14T07:09:00.000-07:00

a day in salem, ma

(my new home!)

ninety-six

2010-06-29T04:09:00.000-07:00

back to the west...

ninety-five

2010-06-06T19:03:00.000-07:00

a whole lot of learning these days

death

and

love

and

endings

and

beginnings

life is brilliant and beautiful

and so very short

live it

enjoy it

fill it

with dreams and whims

and sweetness and kindness

and laughter and kisses

and sadness and dancing

and wide open hearts

to the brim

ninety-four

2010-05-17T17:15:00.000-07:00

a few recent glimpses of this beautiful world...

ninety-three

2010-05-02T20:21:00.000-07:00

a beautiful summery day

yoga class

walking without destination

espresso and an almond scone

and so many lovely tulips

in the boston public garden

ninety-two

2010-04-30T20:01:00.000-07:00

ninety-one

2010-04-29T09:30:00.000-07:00

i spent the majority of my last day

in california

looking into this amazing little face

watching him dance
and run
and laugh

and slide down the playground slide

over & over again

i was showered

all day

with the sweetest

smiles

and

hugs & kisses

this is love

at its truest

at its deepest

at its best

ninety

2010-04-26T19:42:00.000-07:00

today i caught a glimpse of these pretty tulips

as i walked to the train station

and their brightness caught me for a moment

so i stopped

and smiled

and took this little picture

and even though i am facing some

real sadness

right at the surface

i am happy to see such things as this

springtime sweetness

the promise of something new

eighty-nine

2010-04-26T10:47:00.000-07:00

a few images from the beautiful west...

eighty-eight

2010-04-24T13:44:00.000-07:00

rainy morning flower petal heart

home again

after a very lovely trip to my other home

the beautiful west coast

so many happy moments

incredible people

familiar streets

bright sun

bright moon

and so many new things surfacing

as my heart opens

and opens

and opens...

eighty-seven

2010-04-15T10:10:00.000-07:00

Ganesha, remover of obstacles

The universe is so generous

if we are open to receive

it provides just what we need

at the moment we need it

I opened a new book today

and found this poem

it was absolutely one-hundred percent exactly

what i needed to guide me through this day

so much gratitude

You see, I want a lot.

Perhaps I want everything

the darkness that comes with every infinite fall

and the shivering blaze of every step up.

So many live on and want nothing

and are raised to the rank of prince

by the slippery ease of their light judgments.

But what you love to see are faces

that do work and feel thirst.

You love most of all those who need you

as they need a crowbar or a hoe.

You have not grown old, and it is not too late

to dive into your increasing depths

where life calmly gives out its own secret.

~Rainer Maria Rilke

eighty-six

2010-04-14T20:31:00.000-07:00

breathing in

and

breathing out

learning to

let

*again*

learning to

be alive

and awake

this

very

moment

this is hard work

this is love

this is the beginning of the beginning

eighty-five

2010-04-07T20:28:00.000-07:00

favorite

trees!

look up....

eighty-four

2010-04-05T19:02:00.000-07:00

hundreds of small joys and inspirations

on these magnificent spring days

eighty-three

2010-04-02T19:08:00.000-07:00

this is my

favorite tree

eighty-two

2010-03-29T19:56:00.000-07:00

looking forward to this weekend...

a short and sweet trip

to see some amazing people

in a beautiful city called new york

eighty-one

2010-03-29T19:41:00.000-07:00

time sweeps away

the pieces of our broken bridge

and in the quiet places

i remember
and hope

that somewhere

you are smiling

eighty

2010-03-24T07:09:00.000-07:00

the song my heart is singing right now

seventy-nine

2010-03-21T20:48:00.000-07:00

there are buds in the trees

and

sweetness in the air

i am hopeful

and thankful

and full of daydreams

these days

soaking up the first

small gifts

of spring

seventy-eight

2010-03-12T20:08:00.000-08:00

blues...

seventy-seven

2010-03-07T19:50:00.000-08:00

a rather awe-inspiring evening temperature!

dancing lights over the charles river

seventy-six

2010-03-06T19:44:00.000-08:00

seeing simply what is right before us...

a difficult thing to sustain,

but so, so important.

these yellow tulips were my lovely reminder

during this challenging week

that we can choose where to focus.

our eyes

our energy

our hearts.

my patience, honesty, and ego were seriously tested in the past few days.

many anxious evenings.

but i feel like i have come through.

perhaps even with some flying colors.

for i''ve been learning (the hard way) that

if we stay present

and

see what is before us

and

take action only with the

clearest, most honest intention,

we have done our best.

the pains will pass.

good things will shine bright.

seventy-five

2010-02-23T19:53:00.000-08:00

birds in the trees on a gray, gray day

yoga rosebuds

seventy-four

2010-02-22T21:02:00.000-08:00

seventy-three

2010-02-20T17:47:00.000-08:00

today...
the skies were bright

the sun was warm

my heart was light.

soaked it all in with
a long walk and

a big smile.

and then...

home to my mailbox to find my *gift of jewels* waiting for me.

what an absolute delight!

many thanks to beverly for the most lovely and thoughtful little gifts.

and to se'lah for organizing this wonderful exchange.

i really, really enjoyed the entire thing.

the one i crafted was received recently too and the sweet recipient posted about it here.

the simplest things can bring such happiness...

and lastly...

this past week has been full of artistic inspiration.

sparking and sparkling inside.

a dear friend who makes exquisitely beautiful music

came to visit from far away.

we dove deep into conversations and spent some

thrilling time in the studio, sharing and improvising and planting

the seedlings for this new piece.

a true honor and joy to be embarking on this collaboration.

i feel alive and awake.

cannot wait to see what happens next.

seventy-two

2010-02-19T19:30:00.000-08:00

inspiration...

seventy-one

2010-02-16T06:03:00.000-08:00

glimpses of new york

seventy

2010-02-12T04:40:00.000-08:00

left my heart...

sixty-nine (love songs)

2010-02-11T08:17:00.000-08:00

got to see a band i really, really love play last night
the magnetic fields
it was one of the most somber live music experiences
beautiful but sad
with a little bit of laughter
very much like their songs
and it makes me think about being an artist
the wonderful responsibility of seeing the world
filtering it through our hearts
and giving it all back
stephin merritt sees a rather bleak and broken-hearted world
and though i don't always see it that way
i do
some of the time
and i'm thankful for the poignant, poetic
reflections these songs offer

"I'm afraid of the dark without you close to me
I went out to the forest and caught
A hundred thousand fireflies
As they ricochet round the room
They remind me of your starry eyes
Someone else's might not have made me so sad
But this is the worst night I ever had"

~100,000 fireflies by the Magnetic Fields

sixty-eight

2010-02-10T11:55:00.000-08:00

winter sunshine
waiting for a storm
cozy and calm
and thankful
and dreaming

sixty-seven

2010-02-03T20:41:00.000-08:00

"happiness exists
in action
in telling the truth
and saying what your truth is
and in
giving away
what you want the most"

~~eve ensler

sixty-six

2010-02-02T05:18:00.000-08:00

feeling quiet right now.

a lot of questions and wonder.

still aching to do more, give more, to haiti.

the return of the lonely feeling that

is like a chilly draft all night long.

the onset of the certainty that starting over

again

must happen sooner than later...

but.

i do want to say a big, giant, love-filled hello

to sweet february!

we have very high hopes for you.

sixty-five

2010-01-30T20:42:00.000-08:00

the moon is not only beautiful
it is so far away
the moon is not only ice cold
it is here to stay

(cat power)

sixty-four

2010-01-29T05:00:00.001-08:00

a frozen friday
as these
january days
slip quietly
by
and all looks
sweeter
from here
waiting
dreaming
holding on
to that sliver
of sun

sixty-three

2010-01-27T07:18:00.000-08:00

*the simple things*

inspired by Christina over at the beautiful Soul Aperture

winter sunshine streaming in the windows
a big mug of strong coffee
a message from a faraway friend
yoga every day

the look of discovery on a child's face
watching squirrels play
a smile passed between strangers
the pacific ocean

a very long walk
scrabble games with my mom & brother
a bag filled with library books
the promise of spring

truth-telling
compassion
generosity
gratitude

and of course...
love.

sixty-two

2010-01-24T21:08:00.000-08:00

been spending a lot of time inside lately.

not indoors, but inside my mind and heart.

thinking, listening, wondering, dreaming.

and in the end,

knowing that my path will be turning soon.

the devastation in haiti has sparked something deep down.

and i am certain now

that what i need and want and must do

is let everything here go and dedicate myself to service.

my work is a blessing, and i'll never take for granted what a gift it is to be able to dance and teach dance to bright and brilliant little souls.

but there is something more that i need to do.

the peace corps application is bookmarked.

my heart feels, at once, so light and so full.

sixty-one

2010-01-24T21:00:00.000-08:00

sixty

2010-01-14T08:44:00.000-08:00

little secret magic messages
are all over the place.
just take a closer look.

fifty-nine

2010-01-13T20:58:00.000-08:00

tonight my heart is with the people of Haiti.

fifty-eight

2010-01-11T17:34:00.000-08:00

fifty-seven

2010-01-10T21:49:00.000-08:00

falling stars

so many electric nights

we walked

quietly arm in arm

slept in a sweet tangle

laughed

and watched a city unfold

you kissed me

at the eagle tavern

in the apollo theater

in the dark of my room

malls and miles

whiskey and ice

i hold on to you still

always

back of my mind

top of my heart

fifty-six

2010-01-10T11:13:00.001-08:00

photo by Edward Weston

thinking about love
and loneliness
and how the cold, cold weather
makes me think of these things constantly.
it must be in our nature
to wish to be warm beside someone.
to share this strange and beautiful life with another.
to go through all the pains of love for a few sweet, fleeting moments.

alone is okay.
alone can be amazing.
but i can't help dreaming.
and thinking that together sure would be nice too...

fifty-five

2010-01-06T15:08:00.000-08:00

a bit of a bumpy first week...
but it will get better.
just letting things be.
walking through it.
waiting it out.
trusting myself and life to find the way back to inspiration.
this friday i will perform for the first time since moving here.
it is a lovely solo that a friend choreographed.
it is about loneliness and vastness and letting go.
stories i know very well these days.
it will surely be strange and wonderful to be onstage again.
i am scared and thrilled at once.
and that is the beauty of being a performer.
you never, ever stop feeling that quickening,
that lovely and terrible wonder.
that sweet, crisp awareness that you are
absolutely and truly
opened up.
finally
completely
yourself.

fifty-four

2010-01-03T17:54:00.000-08:00

fifty-three

2010-01-01T18:50:00.000-08:00

*cheers to 2010*

fifty-two

2009-12-31T16:37:00.000-08:00

Ring out the old, ring in the new,
Ring, happy bells, across the snow:
The year is going, let him go;
Ring out the false, ring in the true.

....Tennyson

fifty-one

2009-12-26T19:26:00.000-08:00

the beautiful world.

fifty

2009-12-25T13:24:00.000-08:00

merry christmas
love and peace and joy to all

forty-nine

2009-12-22T22:58:00.001-08:00

forty-eight

2009-12-10T10:27:00.001-08:00

everyday things...

forty-seven

2009-12-05T21:53:00.000-08:00

forty-six

2009-12-04T20:51:00.001-08:00

this really is

beautiful city.

forty-five

2009-12-02T16:54:00.001-08:00

full moon, streetlight, train

forty-four

2009-12-01T06:39:00.000-08:00

i was recently blown away by this artist, final fantasy, in performance, opening for the equally amazing mountain goats.
i was reminded of how incredible and powerful a great live music show can be.
it can completely fill up your senses and inspire and stir up so many emotions and ideas.
i'm going to do this much more often!

the art of starting over

one hundred and forty three

one hundred and forty two

one hundred and forty one

one hundred and forty

one hundred and thirty nine

one hundred and thirty eight

one hundred and thirty seven

one hundred and thirty six

one hundred and thirty five

one hundred and thirty four

one hundred and thirty three

one hundred and thirty two

one hundred and thirty one

one hundred and thirty

one hundred and twenty nine

one hundred and twenty eight

one hundred and twenty seven

one hundred and twenty six

one hundred and twenty five

one hundred and twenty four

one hundred and twenty three

one hundred and twenty two

one hundred and twenty one

one hundred and twenty

one hundred and nineteen

one hundred and eighteen

one hundred and seventeen

one hundred and sixteen

one hundred and fifteen

one hundred and fourteen

one hundred and thirteen

one hundred and twelve

one hundred and eleven

one hundred and ten

one hundred and nine

one hundred and eight

one hundred and seven

one hundred and six

one hundred and five

one hundred and four

one hundred and three

one hundred and two

one hundred and one

*one hundred*

ninety-nine

ninety-eight

ninety-seven

ninety-six

ninety-five

ninety-four

ninety-three

ninety-two

ninety-one

ninety

eighty-nine

eighty-eight

eighty-seven

eighty-six

eighty-five

eighty-four

eighty-three

eighty-two

eighty-one

eighty

seventy-nine

seventy-eight

seventy-seven

seventy-six

seventy-five

seventy-four

seventy-three

seventy-two

seventy-one

seventy

sixty-nine (love songs)

sixty-eight

sixty-seven

sixty-six

sixty-five

one hundred